Self-esteem Building in Children: Role of Parents

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self-esteem leads to self-confidence
parents are the key to building a child with self-esteem

SELINA FATEMA BINTE SHAHID

In simple words, ‘self-esteem’ means to feel good about oneself, to be able to evaluate oneself properly. Knowing oneself better and being able to accept oneself as who they are is really valuable. Without it the person may suffer from inferiority complex; The person may lack confidence in; many easy tasks can seem very difficult to him.

Lack of self-esteem leads to negative perceptions of everything, inability to control anger, shame, fear and the tendency to show off, which negatively affects one’s personal, family, and social life. As a result, the person himself and the people close to him are severely affected.

Sense of self-worth develops from childhood.


We know that family is the foundation of all education. Therefore, the role of the family, especially the parents, in building the self-esteem of the child is undeniable.


The following is a brief summary of what parents can do to help build their child’s self-esteem:

  • Praise the children for their good deeds, good qualities, good behavior. Show that you love them. Let them feel good about their importance in your life. Tell them ” You are good “, ” I love you “; praise them infront of other people. It will create confidence in their mind about their own qualities, they will learn to evaluate themselves. However, do not give extra attention in unnecessarily wrong behavior.
  • If there is any shortcomings in the child, simply accept it and tell the child that not everyone has all the qualities, some are good at singing while some are good at sports. Not everyone can do it all at a time. Instead, focus on what he or she can do well. This will not create any inferiority complex in them for not being able to do something and they will not underestimate themselves.
  • Give small responsibilities to the child from an early age, especially from the age of 4 years. For example, packing up toys, folding own clothes. And slowly give them simple tasks to participate in family activities. For example, buying something from the shop, helping to entertain the guests, reminding the elders to take medicine in time etc. Then move on to social responsibilities with age. For example, making them understand the importance of properly greeting neighbors, throwing banana peels in the dustbin when they see them lying on the street or things like that. Parents should also perform these duties in front of the child.

When a person performs personal, family, social and state responsibilities according to his ability, a sense of self-worth is created in the person.

  • Encourage the child to think positively about themselves, about others and about different things. The tendency to always explain things negatively in front of the child needs to be changed. Children usually learn more by watching from adults. Therefore, if the incident is interpreted negatively, the children will tend to look at the incident in a negative light most of the time. Suppose another child has treated your child very badly at school. If you say, the child is rude. His parents did not teach him anything. Then the child may think of himself as better than other children and may have a tendency to despise others. Instead, say, the child might have misunderstood or maybe didn’t do it on purpose. At the same time, you have to show compassion to your child. As a result your child will have a positive perception about both self and others. Only by being a little conscious in this way can we parents build our future generations with self-respect.

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